And Then There Was One

It’s almost here. Only one more day before transfer. Only one more embryo to transfer.

As of this morning, I’m still waiting for the call to tell me the time of the procedure along with my instructions. I am sure I will be in the middle of a ski slope when the clinic calls and our never ending game of voice mail tag will commence. Over the years there have been hundreds of phone calls back and forth between me and two different clinics. In that time there was only one time I recall a live person picking up the phone. One.

As important as this is, I refuse to sit around the phone waiting. The lifts open at 8:30 and I plan to be on one.

Boarding, massages, and dinner were all amazing yesterday. Bill joked that if I ever wanted sympathy for our condition I lost any chance of that after bragging about our Breck and Vail adventures. Never a big fan of sympathy, I can live with that. Undergoing IVF makes planning vacations near impossible, so I will take it where I can get it.

Fortunately we found our snowboard rentals right at the base of the mountain.  Breck was pelted with snow all day, but not so badly that we were uncomfortable.  If anything it kept the hungover Spring Breakers at bay for most of the day and the lift lines short. The snow was perfect and visibility above the tree line was crystal clear. Too bad for them.

On the way down the mountain at day’s  end, we learned  the road to Denver was closed for much of the day due to the weather. This made me more than a little nervous since my clinic is on the other side of that closed road and there is no other way there.  Bill calmed me by committing to rent a helicopter if needed. Luckily we won’t need to be airlifted out of here. Today is clear and we should have smooth sailing on the slopes and at the end of the day as we head back toward our clinic to prepare for our reunion with “The One.”

Last night the sailing wasn’t so smooth, unfortunately. I awoke at 3 AM wrought with terrible cramping. The pain persisted until 5 AM when I broke down and took Tylenol and listened to a 20 minute intuitive self healing meditation.

I haven’t mentioned it here, but I have a large cyst on my left ovary.  I can’t be sure, but the pain this morning felt like it ruptured which is common with my cysts, even though the timing stinks.

I will discuss with the clinic this morning if there is any impact at all to the success of the cycle and we will make a determination from there as to whether we move forward. We have been monitoring it all along and I have been constantly reassured it won’t be an issue. However we never discussed the possibility of it rupturing the day before the procedure.

I prayed for the two hours of torture to maintain the confidence I have in this cycle and that we will be on track with no impact to the outcome of the procedure. I am feeling well both physically and emotionally now.

In all likelihood The clinic will bring our baby back to me tomorrow.

Our one little embryo.

Its a strange feeling only transferring one. We have always transferred multiples, but 17 of 19 of those embryos weren’t genetically tested. We knew it was statistically likely only one would stick. While the idea of twins is appealing from a financial perspective, sort of a IVF BOGO deal, it brings risks that we always hoped to avoid. Still, after every single transfer the mother in me couldn’t help but root for all the embryos.

We always grew excited about our potential twins or triplets.

For this transfer, twins are still possible if the embryo splits into two babies. It is right at the stage where that can happen. In fact, identical twins are more common in both women over 35 and IVF patients.

Check. Check.

But the likelihood is still amazingly low. So this is the first time I will be thinking about and rooting for only one baby. Its not a bad feeling, just a new one.

As they say, “it only takes one”. Unlike 6 of our 7 other transfers we know this one has a very good shot because of the chromosome testing. Ironically, the 35% success rate for this one is slightly higher than that of the success rate for our past multiple embryo cycles. And the upside to only having one is that we can focus all our positive intentions and prayers on this one little burgeoning clump of cells.

Like I said, I have a really good feeling about this little guy or girl.