We are back. Back in treatment. Back in Michigan after our first trip to the clinic. Back to the blog.
Well, not really back to the blog. Not in a meaningful way, anyway. With the new job, a preschooler, treatment, and my reinvigorated faith I don’t have the time to devote to the blog that I once did. In the downtime I have these days I am attending church or bible study, reading daily devotions, or just generally fueling this great renewed love. It has given me tremendous peace during this cycle, so I haven’t needed the blog as an outlet.
However I do want to document and share the process with others. So here it goes.
I went to New Jersey for the first of three embryo banking cycles on October 25th. As usual, I was on a high dose of stimulation medication, but this time we also added daily low dose HCG. The cycle started out pretty rocky with follicle sizes all over the map. I had one large follicle take a strong lead which meant that it was unlikely for many of the very small follicles to catch up and develop into mature eggs. After much debate, we decided to let the large follicle grow larger than normal, knowing that it meant that egg would likely disintegrate. In a fresh cycle, a doctor may not do this because it runs the risk of creating a situation where the lining is out of synch with the timing of embryo development. This worked well for us though because we were freezing and not transferring the embryos.
Normally I take stimulation meds for 11 days prior to being ready for retrieval. This time I responded much faster. So much faster that we had to pay a king’s ransom to change Bill and Evelyn’s flight to have them come join me in time for the procedure. Their arrival was a nail biter with one cancelled flight and a delay. I finally picked them up at La Guardia at nearly midnight instead of Newark as planned. But they made it. A mere 7 hours prior to a procedure that would have been a bust without Bill there to do his part.
The procedure was a raging success and nothing short of a miracle. The day prior to the retrieval the doctor was predicting 6 to 8 mature eggs total given the timing difference in follicle development. It was disheartening news given that in the last several treatments I had many, many more. Still, I prayed that God help us realize our desire to have a child in any way He saw fit, Whether it be from one egg or 20, I just prayed that our miracle was on the way.
After retrieval I was still loopy when the nurse showed me the number of eggs we retrieved circled on a piece of paper. Fourteen! It was far more than expected, but didn’t mean much until we knew how many were mature. We received the call the next day and learned that 12 eggs were mature and 9 fertilized successfully. I was overwhelmed with joy and knew immediately God had His healing hands on this process. These results meant that we obtained a mature egg from every follicle I had, except for two and one of those was likely that very large lead follicle we let go. This was amazing since just the day prior many of these follicles were 3 millimeters or more smaller than the targeted 14mm prior to retrieval and likely to contain immature eggs.
I feel the Lord’s hand in this cycle in such a profound way and I know whatever happens, it is exactly as it should be. We have turned this over completely to God. Still, we are not afraid to ask for help. We are not afraid to ask for healing. We are not afraid to ask for our heart’s desire to be delivered to us. And above all we are not afraid to ask for prayers. We believe in the power of prayer and hope that anyone who prays and is reading this adds us and our embryos to their prayer list.
In fact, my belief in the power of prayer grew even stronger after I allowed three amazing strangers pray with me last Sunday at Gateway Church in New Jersey. It was a very special church and I feel God led me there to be prayed on that day when I and my body needed it most. If you ever have a chance to visit, I encourage you to check it out. It’s the kind of church where the members feel like family, children dance in the isles, and the music is so good you feel like you are at a concert.
We will learn how many make it to the blastocyst stage to be biopsied and tested on Tuesday. I remember this waiting period well and was beside myself with worry the last time. This time is different. This time I know that whatever the result is, its not in our control and I believe that God will lead us to our next child.
Matthew 17:20 “Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed you can say to this mountain, ‘move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”